Life rarely goes completely one’s way. A job interview does not work out, a relationship ends, a critical exam does not meet one’s expectations, the least expected moment runs out of budget, or several days at once are spent coping with an unplanned problem.
Whatever it is, people cannot control many external factors. However, what they can do is react to circumstances in an appropriate manner and resume their path to success despite the setback, and thus develop their resilience.
The Concept of Resilience and How to Train It
According to the American Psychological Association’s experts on the issue, resilience is a process that can be learned and developed over time. Resilience training includes a set of skills in coping with crises and challenges. It can be very individualized depending on what techniques will be used in resiliency training: from stress management, mindfulness practice, adaptive thinking, motivation to take care of yourself to building deep relationships with people around you.
It is essential to realize that resilience training does not mean literally maintaining one’s head over water.
Instead, it is a process of arming oneself with psychological tools to deal with situations that life throws at you every day.
What Are the Benefits of Training One’s Resilience?
Having a solid resilience to stress and disappointments helps to perceive the current situation more realistically than to rush into conclusions and actions that may regrettable later. More predictable results, less emotional burden after the situation is over, an opportunity to bounce back from failure are some advantages of psychological resilience training. And most importantly, no matter how strong a person may be, even professionals have “bad days” when events take a turn that can be described as incredibly sad, infuriating, scary, or disappointing. When the time comes, a resilient person will not be overwhelmed by the circumstances but instead quickly analyze the current reality and figure out what actions to take next.
10 Ways to Boost One’s Resilience
1. Maintain Your Social Connections
A conversation with a best friend who listens without judging can make it easier to accept the situation and move forward. Our connections make it easier for people to understand that we are not alone during difficult periods in our lives. In addition, some connections can give practical help or support.
2. Don't Jump to Conclusions
When negative things have happened, we should avoid jumping to catastrophic conclusions. Instead, we must take a pause to evaluate the gravity of the problem. For example, when someone thinks that everything is going to hell after a small problem occurs, he or she should think about what has happened, what could be done now, and what positive side there might be.
3. Accept the Irrevocable
There are times when despite a person’s efforts, despite their best intentions, nothing goes their way. It is helpful not to waste time and energy fighting reality. Acceptance is a powerful ally in training one’s resilience, allowing a person to redirect attention to what can be changed.
4. Take Care of One’s Body
Psychological resilience is impossible without physical health. Therefore, a good night’s sleep, walks in open air, balanced nutrition, and drinking plenty of water will significantly enhance the effects of any psychological training. Small steps are still steps that help move forward.
5. The Conscious Practice
Sometimes, the noise around us can become overwhelming, necessitating a pause in order to clear one's head for a moment with some deep breathing activities. Five or so minutes devoted to breathing exercises and jotting down thoughts causing stress can lead to a favorable outcome. Many methods including meditation and journaling can contribute to mental resilience-building.
6. Set Small Goals
It can be overwhelming to face reality with a mountain of problems to solve. However, a little resilience coaching will undoubtedly say that these problems can be broken down into several smaller ones. Instead of desperately looking for a solution to a difficult situation, it can be helpful to do what is necessary for today and set aside the rest for tomorrow. It is easier to start, for instance, not with renovating an apartment but with changing light bulbs, and instead of a huge work plan, one can accomplish one task for the day.
7. Learn from Past Experiences
Everyone has already overcome some difficulties and successfully moved on. Therefore, it can be worth analyzing what was done right to endure the past struggles with open arms. What helped? Who was there to support? What is necessary to repeat and what to avoid? This is a resilience coach teaching his students that they already have valuable experiences for drawing conclusions from it.
8. Be Optimistic
Being optimistic is not a requirement for training one’s resilience. However, believing in a positive outcome is essential in those situations where the outcome cannot be affected. A positive attitude allows a person to realize that no matter what happens, they will always have some control over the current moment and can affect future outcomes, rather than focus on the impossibility of changing the existing conditions.
9. Understand How to Identify Meaning and Purpose in Life
Having a purpose is one of the cornerstones of resilience. Meaning in life is manifested as the uniqueness of life itself; therefore, it can be reflected in career aspirations, caring for family, achieving personal goals, developing one’s intellect or being engaged in charitable work. One can move on because those who have already found their place in the life understand their needs and know what they want as well as why. In addition, charitable work and other activities aimed at helping others contribute a lot to building resilience in communities.
10. Reach Out When One Feels Overwhelmed
The most effective way to build individual resilience is to recognize when the situation requires external help. If family and friends are insufficient for coping with difficulties, and a persistent feeling of anxiety, hopelessness, or emptiness occurs, it is necessary to turn to a psychiatrist or psychologist. After all, in the case of prolonged stress, severe grief, emotional trauma, or depression, these problems can only be solved with the help of medication and therapy. Nevertheless, even in this situation, the resilience trainings will not be superfluous.
How Long Does It Take to Train Resilience to Stress?
The answer to the question of the duration of training in the field of stress resilience matters cannot be unique for every person, as it depends on what method works best for them. The duration can also depend on whether a person prefers attending one long session or taking classes regularly. The bottom line is that training for resilience requires time. Hence, practicing meditation for five minutes a day will not result in becoming emotionally strong. At the same time, it does not mean that those five minutes of practice are useless.
Final Thoughts
In conclusion, resilience training refers to the process of accumulating psychological defenses to resist stress and quickly returning to normal functioning after a traumatic event. The ten described steps will allow the individual to increase their resilience to stressors, setbacks, and failures while relying not only on their capabilities but also on external factors. Thus, every day, it is worth spending time on those activities that build mental resilience, for example, contacting a trusted person, going on a walk to analyze the situation, and not doing anything that is too ambitious for the current abilities.
